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24

The Console War: Crossroads, p6

April 3, 2024 by Tim


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GUNnibal
GUNnibal
7 months ago

Looks like Nintendo is about to unlock the original meaning of the phrase “catching strays”.

Cragfast
Cragfast
7 months ago
Reply to  GUNnibal

He’s going to be unintentionally disparaged in a conversation in which he’s not directly involved?

Swagger
Swagger
7 months ago
Reply to  Cragfast

Did you miss the word “original” in that comment?

Cragfast
Cragfast
7 months ago
Reply to  Swagger

No, I didn’t. Perhaps he meant “literal meaning”.

Tully
Tully
7 months ago
Reply to  Cragfast

Are you really this ignorant or just insufferable?

SkullsGrav
SkullsGrav
7 months ago
Reply to  Cragfast

The original meaning of catching strays is to get hit by a bullet that wasn’t aimed at you, so really neither your definition or the OP’s is 100% correct, but they are closer than you are.

Swagger
Swagger
7 months ago
Reply to  SkullsGrav

The OP is literally stating that the nintendos are going to go grab the box and catch stray bullets from the PS and Xbox fighting (if you dont remember, the last comic stated that they’re going to shoot at each other)… OP is literally 100% correct.

Total Loss
Total Loss
7 months ago
Reply to  Cragfast

Failing at life …..

Eldest Gruff
Eldest Gruff
7 months ago
Reply to  Cragfast

No, the boxes are full of lost puppies, which the Switches will have to catch in a hilarious, Yakity Sax-style chase scene.

Pajuka
Pajuka
7 months ago
Reply to  Cragfast

The original context was being shot even though you were never shot at, you were just hit by a bullet that missed its intended target – or “catching” a stray bullet.

It was later adapted to mean to receive a punishment or insult you don’t deserve or was intended for someone else.

Lord Foxxy Foxington
Lord Foxxy Foxington
7 months ago

And somehow Nintendo is winning this war…

The Legacy
The Legacy
7 months ago

It’s probably because they are using console wave tactics.

“ONE SOLDIER GETS A ZAPPER! ONE SOLDIER GETS A CONNECTION CORD! IF THE SOLDIER WITH THE ZAPPER FALLS, YOU TAKE HIS ZAPPER AND CHARGE!”

– The Battle of Saturngrad, probably.

Last edited 7 months ago by The Legacy
SkullsGrav
SkullsGrav
7 months ago

That’s because there’s a lot more to the war than just shooting at each other.

Blondie
Blondie
7 months ago

Can someone explain the name joke, Door and Lick? I have not kept up to date with what Nintendo are up to 🙂

Blondie
Blondie
7 months ago
Reply to  Tim

Thanks Tim <3

Sasquatch
Sasquatch
7 months ago
Reply to  Tim

Is the other one named Knob? 🤞

Axiomite
Axiomite
7 months ago
Reply to  Sasquatch

I was thinking ‘window’. As in Window Licker.

scottsmom
scottsmom
7 months ago
Reply to  Sasquatch

Knob? That is very almost not E for Everyone!

Saixak
Saixak
7 months ago
Reply to  Tim

What’s the guy with the bear/mustache named?

Cygwulf
Cygwulf
7 months ago
Reply to  Blondie

I mean, Lick’s name seems pretty obvious to me.

M37h3w3
M37h3w3
7 months ago

> That was very almost not e for everyone!

Doesn’t the Switch have Doom?

Xenneth
Xenneth
7 months ago
Reply to  M37h3w3

They should’ve gotten Chex Quest.

Ducky
Ducky
7 months ago
Reply to  M37h3w3

The Switch has straight up hentai these days

Eldest Gruff
Eldest Gruff
7 months ago
Reply to  Ducky

What do you think Lick is doing?

MarthKoopa
MarthKoopa
7 months ago
Reply to  M37h3w3

The Switch literally has Omega Labyrinth Life, a game where your character’s breasts grow in size as you level up, all the way to a Z cup. A mini game where you commit “paizuri” to identify items, and a minigame where you rub the girls until they climax to level up their skills. That was HEAVILY CENSORED on Sony, enough to warrant the game being renamed, but zero censorship on Switch.

Yet Switch is the “kiddie” platform still.

Kazuma Taichi
Kazuma Taichi
7 months ago
Reply to  MarthKoopa

Following up on that, I’ve heard that the xbox release of FF14 has some wild censorship. People getting banned for saying Free Company (an in game term), but also shit like “fanny” will get censored in the chat

Yet Nintendo is the “kiddie” game company still

ouRKaoS
ouRKaoS
7 months ago

…aaaaaannnnd Lick is now my favorite!

Xan
Xan
7 months ago

I thought last time we say nintendo in the war, they were smarter and deadlier than this.

Last edited 7 months ago by Xan
Jacob
Jacob
7 months ago
Reply to  Xan

That may have been the Wii-U ?

the who
the who
7 months ago
Reply to  Jacob

the last few comics nintendo was kind of operated like a commando team.

wkz
wkz
7 months ago
Reply to  the who

Probably because those are their commando teams, and these “doing dead-end sentry duty in the middle of nowhere” guys are their line troops.

Eldest Gruff
Eldest Gruff
7 months ago
Reply to  Xan

They might have more territory, but that’s because they’re mostly ignoring the areas that Microsoft and Sony are hotly fighting over, and instead snatching up a ton of territory that the two would normally overlook.

The individual soldiers can’t go toe to toe with the other two, but they often don’t have to, because command keeps them in advantageous positions., and equips them with weaponry that, while underpowered, is both extremely reliable and of high quality with almost no misfires, and sporting innovations that Sony and Microsoft probably won’t see until their R&D starts copying them a few years later.

MarthKoopa
MarthKoopa
7 months ago
Reply to  Xan

I think the joke is that Nintendo doesn’t feel the need to put their best in this kind of territory. It’s not their focus at all.

Xan
Xan
7 months ago

Just went back down the backlog of console war chapters and June 28, 2021, definitely showed that nintendo is not e for everyone. Still Lick is best boy

Someone
Someone
7 months ago
Reply to  Xan

Guess Tim really is hammering down on the “haha switch is so stupid and only for kids” nowadays.

Kinda lame tbh.

Kat Gaea
Kat Gaea
7 months ago
Reply to  Someone

I kinda see it as Nintendo doesn’t consider the crossroads important so they have their worst soldiers there.

Rudfud
Rudfud
7 months ago
Reply to  Tim

I am all for more Console Wars through the eyes of the soldiers, it’s probably my favorite of your comic series outside of Analog and D-Pad.

SkullsGrav
SkullsGrav
7 months ago
Reply to  Tim

These three have parental controls on? 🙂

TomB
TomB
7 months ago
Reply to  Tim

I was listening to all the conjectures to tie to what you wrote in the comic and my brain was saying ‘Sometimes everything doesn’t have a hidden meaning’ and then you wrote the above…

I figured you’d be looking to main a point (or to setup a gag) as a focus rather than trying to find parallels for ever action or character – that way lies madness (and boredom).

Looking forward to more.

Xan
Xan
7 months ago
Reply to  Tim

This is my favorite spin off series
The console wars has been excellent. This makes me see it in a new light time. I am curious though, will the Mobile industrial empire(cell phones games) be joining the war?

Heldarion
Heldarion
7 months ago
Reply to  Xan

Does “e for everyone” is a PG rating thing? I’m out of the loop

Kazuma Taichi
Kazuma Taichi
7 months ago
Reply to  Heldarion

Similar, but not exactly. PG is an MPA rating, which is a rating board that handles movies and the like. E is an ESRB rating, which is the rating board that handles video games.

The ESRB equivalent of PG is T (for teens), and the MPA equivalent of E is G

Mike
Mike
7 months ago
Reply to  Kazuma Taichi

It seems more parallel that Early Childhood=G, Everyone=PG, Teen=PG-13 (see how much sense this is making?), Mature=R, and Adults Only=NC-17 with the overblown restrictions.

Freddie!
Freddie!
7 months ago
Reply to  Mike

Close: PG=Parental Guidance, sorta “come back with an adult to vouch for ya, kid.” Back when I was a young lad, that rating was called “M” for Mature.

Drew
Drew
7 months ago

Tim! You should be ashamed! “Monkey fudge’n…” How rude.
*Shakes head in disappointment*

Jacob
Jacob
7 months ago
Reply to  Drew

They play a shorter version of this Rookie of the Year clip on the morning radio show occasionally:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4BD6vHLP2g

TomB
TomB
7 months ago
Reply to  Drew

The Enraged Monkey Lobby will be going after Tim now….

*lol*

DanVzare
DanVzare
7 months ago

The Nintendo Switch is the only console you can get games that are uncensored… and yet they’re also the ones that are being depicted as wanting everything to be rated “E for everyone”?

Come on man, get with the times. This is the Switch not the SNES!
Nintendo has long since done a full 180 on that stance.

Lrbearclaw
Lrbearclaw
7 months ago
Reply to  Tim

Moments like this you remember that while gaming can be stimulating and challenge us to read between the lines…

There are many others who have the mental acuity and reading comprehension of a toddler.

D Harshman
D Harshman
7 months ago
Reply to  Lrbearclaw

Some people match very well with this Switch squad…

leduk
leduk
7 months ago
Reply to  D Harshman

indeed, ppl judging “mental acuity and reading comprehension” with just one comment.

Solar Zero
Solar Zero
7 months ago

Feels like these guys missed an update or two. When was the last time they actually got new orders since being stranded here?

Eldest Gruff
Eldest Gruff
7 months ago

None of them are in ‘charge’ because none of them have the face dock, and are therefore not charging. These are all mobile units: “on the go,” so to speak.

And if they’re all carrying the newest weaponry – the PPch “Showtime” rifle – it’s no wonder they’re all acting a little… odd.

JozMk.II
JozMk.II
7 months ago

Should have made him say “I’m gonna get us one of those monkey-fighting boxes in that Monday-to-Friday crossroad”

Craig
Craig
7 months ago

People on here forgetting that this is Blood Gulch, not Master Chief.

Detton
Detton
7 months ago

I would take a bullet for Lick.

Kevin
Kevin
7 months ago

I have Catherine Full Body for the Switch, E for everyone is funny to think about sometimes

DevMerlin
DevMerlin
7 months ago

What the heck happened to these Switches? They’re significantly dumber than the ones we’ve seen so far. I think.

Pulse
Pulse
7 months ago

i dont what i like more, that one is going “get the box, want the box!” or that they are fighting over whos in charge.

also the chance it breaks out into a fight for the box…only for the switch to rip it open and toss out the contents and bolt away with his prize

Bakhtosh
Bakhtosh
7 months ago

Where does the Steam Deck fall in this? Is it still part of the PC master race?