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Bad Teacher

August 2, 2019 by Tim

Between dragging teenagers into life and death battle, sapping their motivation, stalking them around campus, and crushing their hopes and dreams, I’m beginning to think I’m not a very good Professor in Fire Emblem…


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Bwauder
Bwauder
2 years ago

That isn’t what you’re meant to do with teenagers? I wasn’t aware they were good for much else.

Dodgy
Dodgy
2 years ago
Reply to  Bwauder

Not since they abolished child slavery. :/

Mahmoud Schahed
Mahmoud Schahed
2 years ago

You’re still better than me. Technically, min-maxing like that saves the world. Crush hopes and dreams to help people survive. Me, I’d take one look at that face telling me she wants to heal people and just immediately let her do whatever she wants. I’m way too big a softie man.

Heal the world, blue-haired girl, heal the world. (Sniff!)

Qmer Kacha
Qmer Kacha
2 years ago

I am suprised. Everybody wants me to become a doctor.

Dodgy
Dodgy
2 years ago
Reply to  Qmer Kacha

Not me! I want you to become an antiquarian!

ArdentSlacker
ArdentSlacker
2 years ago
Reply to  Dodgy

Yes, and then I’ll set up a date with a Quarian! Tali Zor’ah has a cute cousin. The resulting explosion would… oh, shoot, wrong genre. They may not actually bang. 🙁

Bajah
2 years ago

My favorite parts are when the conversation is scenes like Ferdinand being a douchenozzle and Hubert calling him out on it and lighting each other up, then their support level improves. “You suck,” “No, you suck,” Support is now a C!

Vandril
Vandril
2 years ago
Reply to  Bajah

Real friends fight and stay friends.

Bajah
2 years ago
Reply to  Vandril

There’s a difference between friends fighting and two dudes voicing extreme distaste for each other. 🙂

Vandril
Vandril
2 years ago
Reply to  Bajah

This was two guys doing the latter during the former. 😛

MarthKoopa
MarthKoopa
2 years ago

It’s kinda weird the game will even let you make people a class their stats won’t ever be suited for. You’d think changing into a knight would shift their growths to more defensive gains… but if they were destined to be a priest, they’ll still get those mag/res growths and no str/def.

Alex
Alex
2 years ago
Reply to  MarthKoopa

Is there a way to see that kind of Info in the game? with luck i am planning to get the game today IF i can find any copy in my country.

BakaGrappler
BakaGrappler
2 years ago
Reply to  Alex

Any stat that had Budding Potential will come with three empty stars on the right side. By Teaching them those skills directly you will unlock their hidden affinity. It’s also a good way to decide their future by going through the Advanced jobs list and seeing what they are suited to in your play through. For instance, Dorothy originally is skilled in Swords and Reason magic, meaning she’d make a good Mortal Savant. BUT Dorothy has a Budding Talent for Faith Magic, which unlocks a unique skill when you tutor her enough. So, with talent for both Reason and Faith,… Read more »

MarthKoopa
MarthKoopa
2 years ago
Reply to  Tim

Not what I’m talking about. Stats, not skills. No matter what you do to a magic person, they can never do strength things. Look up stat growths at Serenes Forest.

Arthiem
Arthiem
2 years ago
Reply to  MarthKoopa

well back when I was playing Fire Emblem, Soren’s spell book broke, so I watched in horror as the enemies turn came, then he proceeded to fuck up a good 8 solders with his dagger before shanking the general to death winning the match and saving his comrades.

from then on he was my favorite character.

James Rye
James Rye
2 years ago

You only need one healer but you can never have enough tanks.^^

BakaGrappler
BakaGrappler
2 years ago
Reply to  James Rye

I like having more than one for when I have to split the party.

Dodgy
Dodgy
2 years ago
Reply to  BakaGrappler

Split your healer also, so they both have half a healer (which is better than no healer!).

Leon
Leon
2 years ago

Follow your dreams………

Dodgy
Dodgy
2 years ago
Reply to  Leon

…right into the gutter!

Leon
Leon
2 years ago
Reply to  Leon

It doesn’t matter if you’re white or black or even a sasquatch, as long as you follow your dreams, no matter how crazy or against-the-law they are…….unless you’re a sasquatch, then the rules are different

Dodgy
Dodgy
2 years ago
Reply to  Leon

#sasquatchlivesmatter

Kaitensatsuma
Kaitensatsuma
2 years ago

This feels very reminiscent of my time in High School

Dodgy
Dodgy
2 years ago
Reply to  Kaitensatsuma

I know right?! I sucked at Armor 101 but excelled at heavy weapons training!

JanTuts
2 years ago

This reminds me of my playthrough of XCOM: Enemy Unknown 😛

Dodgy
Dodgy
2 years ago
Reply to  JanTuts

Until all of your other troops are dead and you are left with a team of medics.

CombatMagi
CombatMagi
2 years ago

Lies you can never have to many healers, especially since everyone has their own list of “healing” magic.

Halosty
Halosty
2 years ago
Reply to  CombatMagi

I guess it depends on how many people you can have… I don’t know the party sizes in this game but I’d assume as a tactical game it at least sometimes goes above 5, probably a lot higher- and then you could definitely make use of additional healers.

Brian
Brian
2 years ago

What is even this game? Fire Emblem has gotten weeeeeird

Freelance
Freelance
2 years ago

If Final Fantasy Tactics has taught me anything, always bring a backup/secondary healer with you in case something happens to your main, whether it be too far away on the field, out of mp, stoned, dying, mute…. The point is don’t always expect that just one will get you out of everything.

ArdentSlacker
ArdentSlacker
2 years ago
Reply to  Freelance

ALWAYS have a backup plan. Had a game of Torg hinge on my insistence that my character bring a spare knife in his boot. His shotgun glitched out of existence from a bad roll. Well… okay, it hinged a lot more on the macguffin surviving so much blunt trauma in the hands of a violent character with a shortage of other weapons.

If only they’d had a plan for weapon failure in a game system where botched rolls can result in weapon failure…

Freelance
Freelance
2 years ago
Reply to  ArdentSlacker

Gibbs Rule Number Nine: Always bring a knife.

BakaGrappler
BakaGrappler
2 years ago

I know it’s a joke, but… you know about Adjutants, right? Slap that girl onto someone as a heal bot instead of a metal wall and you can kinda fulfill her hopes and dreams…? But if anyone is going to live a life of misery I guess it would be Marianne…

But on the other-other hand… I would have made Lorenz into the Fortress Knight. He’s got the most punchable face in the game after all.

Dodgy
Dodgy
2 years ago
Reply to  BakaGrappler

A punchable face is quite important if you want a character to aggro the mobs to keep them off your healer!

Boomchickenpop
Boomchickenpop
2 years ago

I think I must be playing the game wrong….